A Question of Race

 

We are blessed to live in a diverse neighborhood. Asher, being extremely social, has friends and makes friends with people from all walks of life. 

Increasingly, I see him seek out other Black kids. Not at the exclusion or expense of other friendships. But simply having a stronger sense of identity and therefore a stronger connection to others who look like him. I think this is appropriate, and it makes me happy that Asher is both easy to be friends with for all kids and someone who desires to be friends with other Black kids.

Invariably, I will toddle over to tell Asher something, and most kids will register some form of surprise, but it's always only the Black kids who'll ask Asher, "That's your dad?" At this age, all kids recognize race. But not all kids are equally comfortable exploring the topic. 

Race is a complex topic in this country and at this time. But this should make it all the more necessary for dinner table discussions in all households. Instead, we treat it as taboo, stick to platitudes, or say things that don't fly in mixed company.

Asher calling some grey-haired Asian dude "Dad" is legitimately worth a double-take. I welcome the curiosity. I worry that an unwillingness to engage on such issues portends a society Asher will grow into that is not ready to handle race with the nuance and concern that it is due.