Monday, January 19, 2009

Abandonment

Maybe this is typical of all little girls, or maybe the circumstances
of Jada's earliest days play a role. Whatever the reason, Jada can
sometimes get very anxious about getting left behind. She is loath to
use the bathroom one more time before we head out, because she thinks
while she's using the potty we're all going to split. And if Amy
heads out for quick errand just as Jada is waking up from her nap,
there will be fireworks.

The latter happened yesterday, and there was a poignancy and vigor to
Jada's fighting me to the door as Amy left the house. She balled up
inside our door, weeping for several minutes, before accepting my hug,
right after which she slumped into my arms and said, "I miss Mama."

As sassy and grown-up as she can be sometimes, there are other days
when I hearken back to when we first got her: the spunk was faintly
there, but mostly what you saw on the outside was a malnourished,
scared little girl. That scared little girl is still a part of who
Jada is after all these years.

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